


Meaningful Walks

by TheMysteriousStoryteller



Category: Caduceus | Trauma Center Series
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, aaaaaaaaa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-22
Updated: 2020-03-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:07:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,622
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23257402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMysteriousStoryteller/pseuds/TheMysteriousStoryteller
Summary: Derek, trying to find ways to cope with everything that has happened after Emilio's death, finds comfort in the most unexpected of ways.
Relationships: Victor Niguel/Derek Stiles, its very implied though
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	Meaningful Walks

**Author's Note:**

> Hey all! Here's that rewrite. This has been in the lab for like, months. I started writing it in February or something, and it's just been sitting there as I gradually work on it. I'm so happy to get it done. I hope you guys enjoy it, because I had a lot of fun writing it. Expect more of this ship and, if you haven't, play some Trauma Center games. Or watch Game Grumps play Trauma Center: Second Opinion. It's a highly underrated series. Anyway, with that, I hope you guys have a lovely morning/afternoon/night, and I promise I won't disappear for three months again! Edit: I forgot to mention comments are always appreciated please comment on this and tell me I'm a good noodle

Victor could feel the wave of melancholy sweep over the R&D Department as soon as he heard the doors open. 

That was the kind of effect Derek Stiles had on everyone. When he was happy, the rooms would seem brighter, and everyone around would be smiling along with him; when he was sad, the colors around him seemed to dull, and people would wear frowns on their faces. It was such a strange phenomenon —one that not even someone as smart as Victor could explain. But it happened, and it  _ was  _ happening right now. As soon as those heavy double doors opened, the atmosphere changed. Victor, however, remained largely unchanged by it. His eyes moved away from the report he was typing out to the surgeon standing in the doorway. 

As he expected, Derek was completely devoid of any emotion. The doctor’s coat that he usually wore was missing, leaving him in simply the shirt he wore under it. He stood ridgid, his arms stiffly at his sides and his shoulders tensed up; his mouth was completely straight, and his lips were pursed together; his eyes, dull and void of life, moved around as if they were searching for something. Soon, his eyes locked on Victor, who immediately looked right back at his screen. Though he felt as if he already knew the answer, Victor still wondered why Derek was at the R&D Department. 

His question was answered when Derek began to walk over to his desk. Repressing a sigh, he looked back up at the doctor. “What do you want, Stiles?” He asked, his tone as scathing as ever. 

“Hey, Victor. Sorry to bother you,” Derek apologized, his voice completely flat. 

“You should be. Now, what do you want?” Victor repeated, spinning his chair toward Derek to fully face the other. He grimaced a bit, finding that the other looked even worse up close. If it weren’t for the Caduceus ID badge clipped to his shirt, Victor would’ve sworn that Derek wasn’t even a doctor; he definitely looked more like a patient. 

“Well, I was gonna go take a walk outside,” Derek started, “I was...wondering if you’d wanna come with me.” 

To say that Victor was taken aback would be an understatement. The researcher was utterly flabbergasted by Derek’s request. A billion questions flew through Victor’s mind, but the first one that came out of his mouth was, “Why me? Why don’t you ask someone like Dr. Chase, or Nurse Thompson? Or anyone else other than me?”

“They’ve all left for the night,” Derek replied. 

“Why don’t you walk alone, then?”   
  
“I...don’t really wanna be alone,” Derek softly admitted in a heavy-hearted tone, rubbing the back of his neck and looking away. Victor cringed a little. How could a doctor with this high of stature be  _ this  _ pathetic? He sighed to himself, internally reasoning that it wasn’t  _ completely  _ Derek’s fault he was acting like this. Losing a patient—especially one that you’ve already saved before—would be tough for anyone to deal with. Still, though, seeing such an optimistic person like Derek be reduced to this was hard to watch. 

“...Right,” Victor eventually replied. “Well, I’m kinda busy right now, so....” 

“You’re always busy,” Derek remarked. 

“Really? I didn’t notice.” Victor rolled his eyes. Derek frowned and looked down again. 

“Well...it’s fine, I guess. I’ll just go alone.” Derek turned and began to walk away, leaving Victor to stare after him. He breathed out a long, loud sigh, turning back toward his report. However, the surgeon’s sad, dull eyes and perpetual frown wouldn’t leave his head. Seriously, Derek looked like a kicked puppy after Victor delivered his sarcastic remark. It was so pitiful that it honestly made Victor feel  _ bad  _ about turning him down. He shouldn’t feel bad, though! He had work to do! 

Though, by the time Derek was at the double doors, Victor had ceased his attempts to justify himself. He let out another sigh, saved his work, turned his computer off and got up to follow Derek. “Wait, Derek,” he said to get the other’s attention. “I...changed my mind. I’ll come with.” 

“Really?” For the first time in a few days, Victor saw the tiniest glitter in Derek’s eyes that made him think that maybe it  _ was _ a good thing he changed his mind.

“Er...yeah. I mean...some fresh air couldn’t hurt, I guess,” Victor answered, stretching a little and listening to everything in his body crack. Derek nodded and turned back toward the doors, opening them and stepping aside to let Victor through. He did the same thing with the exit doors as well, shivering as he felt a chilly breeze sweep past them. Victor, still wearing his labcoat and being accustomed to the brisk air of the lab, was unaffected by the cold and simply walked outside. Derek followed him, shutting the exit door as he walked out. 

Their walk was silent at first. Occasionally, Victor would glance at Derek and find the other staring blankly ahead, looking oddly pensive. It was a look that the researcher would only really see during intense operations, or when he was usually the Healing Touch(which was usually during those aforementioned intense operations). Seeing it outside of the operating room was definitely new. However, Victor chose to disregard that and continue to walk beside Derek. 

Soon, the silence was broken by the sound of chattering teeth. Again, Victor glanced at Derek, who had wrapped his arms around himself as he walked. He rolled his eyes. 

“Are you cold?” Victor asked, already knowing the answer. 

“A-A little,” Derek mumbled.

“It’s not even that cold, ya know.”   
  
“Well, it is to me.” 

“Are you seriously that sensitive?” 

“Maybe.” Derek looked down. Victor closed his eyes for a moment before stopping, causing Derek to stop and give him a confused look. After a few moments, Victor took his lab coat off and tossed it at Derek. A soft gasp left the doctor as he clutched the coat tightly in his arms to keep it from falling. 

Before Derek could question him, Victor ordered, “Put it on. I’m sick of hearing your damn chattering.” 

“A-Are you sure?”   
  
“Yes. Put the damn coat on.” 

“Okay, okay…” Derek put the coat on, finding that it did make him feel warmer despite it being a tad small on him, and it being merely a rather thin lab coat. He grabbed the edges of the coat to wrap it a little more tightly around himself. 

“Feel better?” Victor asked, crossing his arms and beginning to walk again. Derek nodded and followed. Their walk fell into silence. Victor continued to steal glances at Derek, finding that the other was wearing that intense, pensive expression again. With a click of his tongue, Victor questioned, “Alright, spit it out. What’s on your mind, Stiles?”   
  
“Huh?” Derek looked at Victor, his gaze bewildered. “What’d you say?” 

“Seriously?” Victor’s eyes narrowed. “I asked you what was on your mind.”

“Oh, uh...nothing, really…” Derek trailed off into silence. Victor let out an annoyed sigh. 

“I know you’re lying,” he simply said. “You look seriously deep in thought, and it’s pissing me off. So, what are you thinking about?” 

“Okay, you got me.” Derek let out a humorless laugh that sort of unsettled Victor. Regardless, the surgeon continued, “I’m thinking about a lot of things, actually. I mean...I don’t even really know what to do anymore.”   
  
“What’s that mean?” 

“I mean...should I even continue being a doctor?” Derek looked down at the ground, kicking a small pebble and watching it bounce a few feet ahead of them. “What good am I without the Healing Touch?” 

Victor rolled his eyes. “Do you seriously think that the Healing Touch is the  _ only  _ reason you’re here?” 

“I…it’s at least a big part, right?” 

“You really are an idiot,” Victor told Derek, making the other frown and mutter, “ouch…” Ignoring Derek, Victor continued, “Yeah, your Healing Touch is a part, but how many operations have you done  _ without  _ the Healing Touch?”    
  
“A lot, I guess…”    
  
“Exactly.” Victor looked at Derek, who was still looking at the ground. “Look, you’re a damn good surgeon, whether you have the Healing Touch or not, okay?”   
  
A soft gasp left Derek. He looked up at the researcher, his eyes shimmering behind his glasses. “You mean that?” 

Victor groaned quietly at the sight of Derek’s hopeful gaze. “Yeah, but don’t let it get to your head.” 

“Well...thanks, I guess.” Derek looked back down. “But still, ever since Emilio and Adel, I...I’ve felt so useless.”    
  
“That’s probably because you haven’t done anything since then, Stiles.”   
  
“Yeah, but...I  _ can’t  _ do anything. If I try to operate again, I’ll just fail.” 

“With the way you are right now, I can’t say that’s untrue,” Victor admitted, making Derek sigh. “But, you don’t  _ have  _ to be like this,” he continued, trying to add a touch of optimism to make the other perk up a little. 

“I wish I had a choice,” Derek replied with a light shrug. 

“Have you considered therapy?”    
  
“Actually, Dr. Kasal recommended it to me after everything happened, so...yeah. I’ve been seeing a therapist.” Derek rubbed his upper arm and looked up at one of the streetlights as they passed by it. 

“Good,” Victor nodded a little, “sounds like you need it.”

“Mhm,” Derek absently agreed. His ambedo led him to catch on to things that he would normally consider as background noise: the leaves of surrounding trees softly swishing in the gentle breeze; the chirping of crickets all around them; the soft tapping of their shoes against the sidewalk; the way the wind would swish around them in an almost spiral-like way at times...he found himself getting lost in the sounds and sights. 

Again, their walk fell into silence. Derek’s gaze eventually went back to the ground, kicking a few pebbles that were in front of them. Victor suppressed an annoyed sigh as he heard the soft, repetitive tap of rock hitting concrete. He made no comment, though; he was sure that Derek would lead the conversation, anyway. That seemed logical. After all, Derek  _ was  _ the more loquacious one. Plus, he invited him on this stupid walk in the first place. 

_ Speaking of, just why did I join _ —

“Dr. Kasal advised me to do something else, too.”   
  
_ …more on that later.  _

Victor looked up at Derek, an eyebrow raising. “And…?” He prompted, a twinge of interest in his voice. 

“He said I should leave Caduceus—”

“What?!” Victor couldn’t stop himself from letting out a surprised yell. After all, the idea of Derek leaving Caduceus was  _ stupid _ . Sidney couldn’t just...tell Derek he should leave! He was one of their best doctors! It was completely illogical to permanently send him away! 

Derek jolted back a little at Victor’s outburst, his eyes wide. “I-It’d just be temporary!” He quickly finished, his voice shaky. He rose his hands up and waved them a little in front of himself. “He just suggested that I go somewhere for a while. He said something about a temporary transfer to Hope Hospital…” He rubbed the back of his neck. 

“Oh.” And just like a switch, Victor’s shoulders and tone relaxed. Which, in all honesty, left him more confused than before. Why did  _ he _ care so much? Sure, Caduceus would be losing their best doctor, which would be an obvious detriment, but they functioned fine before he came.  _ Victor  _ functioned fine before he came. So, why was it such a big deal now? Before he could ponder the possibilities, Derek began to speak again. 

“Honestly, I’m thinking about taking him up on his offer,” the doctor admitted, “I mean...it couldn’t hurt to at least try it, right?”   
  
“...right,” Victor answered after a pause. “You probably need a change of scenery, so you can learn to be a doctor again.” 

“That’s what Dr. Kasal said.”   
  
Victor scoffed in reply. Derek turned to look behind them, noting how Caduceus wasn’t even visible anymore. “Wow...we’ve walked pretty far,” he remarked. Victor looked behind them as well. 

“Huh, really? I couldn’t tell,” he sarcastically answered with a small smirk, making Derek let out a small, “Hey…” 

“I think I’m ready to head back now, though,” Derek said after a pause, “it’s getting pretty late, and...I’m really cold.” 

“You’re still cold?” Victor asked as he turned around. 

“Uh...yeah? Your lab coat isn’t exactly the warmest thing in the world.”   
  
“Well, yeah, but still. It isn’t that cold out.” 

“To  _ you _ . _ I’m _ freezing.” 

“Well, that sure as hell doesn’t sound like my problem.” Victor blinked as he heard Derek let out a few laughs. He looked over at Derek, his eyes a little wide. Derek’s eyes were closed, and his body jerked up with every soft laugh. Of course, Victor asked, “Why are you laughing?”

“It’s just—” Derek took a moment to calm down. He opened his eyes, still smiling a little. “I don’t know. You’re still treating me like you always do, even when all of this has happened.” 

“Why wouldn’t I?” Victor crossed his arms. “You’re still Derek Stiles, seriously depressed or not.”    
  
“Huh,” Derek simply replied with a cadence of surprise. Then, he said, “That’s...actually kind of nice to hear. Thanks.” 

“Oh, uh...you’re welcome?” Victor muttered in reply, averting his gaze to the ground. He narrowed his eyes a little, pondering why Derek would thank him for his mordant way of joking, but ultimately said nothing. Derek began to kick back the pebbles he had been kicking before. 

Their walk to Caduceus was silent, but neither of them seemed to mind. There was nothing to really be said, after all; at least, nothing that either of them would willingly say. Without thinking, Victor opened the door for Derek, who blinked and gave Victor a surprised look. “Oh, uh...thanks,” he said, walking through. 

“Yeah, whatever,” Victor replied, following Derek in and letting the door shut itself. They got to the doors of the R&D Department before Derek stopped and turned to look at Victor, who stopped as well. 

“I really appreciate you going on that walk with me.” Derek said, slipping off the lab coat. “I think I really needed that.”   
  
“Y...Yeah. Er, don’t mention it.” Victor cursed himself internally for tripping a little over his own words. He didn’t do it for long, though, since Derek was soon presenting him with his own coat. He wordlessly took it and put it back on, surprised to find that it was actually quite warm. 

“I’m probably gonna go home, now,” Derek told him, “Ari’s probably wondering where I am.”   
  
“Ari?” Victor raised an eyebrow. 

“My cat.” 

“Ah.”   
  
“Yeah…” Derek rubbed the back of his head, his fingers tangling in his messy hair. “So, I’ll...see you later. Hopefully.”   
  
“Right.” Victor backed up against the door, slowly pushing it open. His eyes were still locked on Derek’s. There was a deliberate, heavy silence that fell between them, filled with unspoken words and indescribable feelings.

It soon ended with Victor breaking eye contact, pushing the door farther open. “See you later, Derek,” he muttered before stepping into the room. “Good luck,” he added on. Just before closing the door, he swore he saw the corners of Derek’s lips turn upward. 

For a moment after he closed the door, he put his back gently to it and let out a deep sigh, welcoming the coldness against him. He looked down at his lab coat, noting that it smelled like a cologne that most assuredly wasn’t his. 

Oh, damn, there was no amount of work in the world that would distract him from all of this. 


End file.
